Is Happiness A Formula?

The Deliberate Formula: A New Approach To Goal Setting

Regret is a common theme in many stories. It might be the regret of not spending enough time with family, of not pursuing a dream career with more vigour, or of not achieving childhood aspirations like becoming a professional footballer (this may be a bit too personal. ha.). These regrets often surface when we look back and realise the trade-offs we've made in the pursuit of success.

I was recently listening to an entrepreneur recount his journey of selling his vegetable oil business for £100 million. His story was a rollercoaster of triumphs and setbacks, culminating in an impressive achievement. Yet, despite his success, at the end of his talk he expressed: "My only regret is not spending enough time with my children." This struck a deep chord with me, prompting a crucial question: Are we making the wrong sacrifices to achieve success? and more importantly, Can we still be successful without making them?

This introspection helped with the creation of The Deliberate Formula—a six-step method designed to help individuals lead intentional, balanced lives, and achieve true fulfilment. This formula not only assists in discovering one's purpose and values but also provides a structured approach to setting and achieving goals through a method I created called SWEDOR.

Since implementing The Deliberate Formula in my own life, I have managed to run a business with a team of nine, compete internationally in sports, learn Russian to communicate with a refugee family we hosted for a year, and home school my two sons alongside my wife. My mission now is to share this transformative formula with the world, one deliberate step at a time.

Step 1: Dream

The first step is to think about what you want your life to look like. This is done by looking at the different areas that make up your life, such as activity & leisure, health, relationships etc. Most times we are taught to create balance across all of these areas, but I personally think that’s not true. I believe in weighting the different areas, not balancing them. So at this stage you would identify where you want to put your energy and your efforts.

Step 2: Prioritise

This one is pretty self explanatory. Once you have done the dreaming, it is time to get realistic and look at which areas of your life are the most important to you based on those dreams.

Step 3: Plan

Once you have a clear understanding of your values and passions, the next step is to set well-defined goals. This is where the SWEDOR goal setting method comes into play.

Step 4: Chunk

Chunking involves having somewhere that you can clearly organise your day, such as a daily planner or Google Calendar. Here you can ‘chunk’ together your daily tasks and set aside time each day (or however often you need based on what you came up with in the planning stage) to start working towards achieving your goals. 

Step 5: Sacrifice

After the chunking stage, you will probably find that you have a very full diary - this is where sacrifice comes in. Here, you can look back at your ‘ priority list’ and use this to decide what you can sacrifice to achieve your goals.

Step 6: Action

Now, it’s time to start working towards your goals.

Living Without Regrets

The Deliberate Formula is not just a method; it’s a mindset shift. It’s about making conscious choices that align with your values and long-term happiness. By following these six steps, you can achieve success without sacrificing what truly matters to you.

The story of the entrepreneur who regretted not spending enough time with his family is a powerful reminder that success should not come at the cost of our personal lives. By living deliberately, we can strive for achievements while ensuring that our most important relationships and values remain intact.

As someone who has successfully applied this formula, I can attest to its transformative power. One of my current goals is to share this approach with others, helping them to live more intentional, fulfilled lives.

If you want to know more about The Deliberate Formula and go into more detail on each of the 6 steps, please get in touch!